Yes, my title is from the moster mash, and yes, i'm doing it right now. How does one Monster Mash? This is the question of the day....
Anyway, I am super pumped for Rocky to open tonight. As Tim said, we've all put alot of Blood, Sweat, Tears, and Semen into this production, and it's just gonna be a grand old time. <3
Here's what you can expect if you come to see it!
I am going to miss this cast so much after the show is done. There's nothing like being absolutely comfortable dancing and singing in your underwear with a group of people.
The newspaper in Monroe did a giagantic article about the show, and I'm all over the pictures. It's fantastic. I need to scan it for sure!
In other news, Throat Coat Tea (thank you Ray) is making a big impression on the lives of myself and my cast, haha. I'm drinking some right now!
Everything else is peachy keen, I'm working out the details to stuff like school, debt, and jobs. You do what you have to do, even if it's not what you exactly WANT to do. Everything happens for a reason and a half, and it's gonna be okay.
One last commercial from Robert, and then I'm off to write out invitations to Laura's Batchlorette Party!
Friday, September 26, 2008
I've always loved Chris Rock.
(CNN) -- Republican presidential candidate John McCain is just holding on like a boxer before he gets knocked out, comedian Chris Rock says.
Comedian Chris Rock told Larry King he's proud of Barack Obama's character.
Rock, an avid supporter of Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama, spoke with CNN's Larry King on Thursday. He said Obama is more grounded with your average American -- not somebody like McCain with "12 houses."
"The other guy [McCain] can lose five houses," Rock said.
"I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house." Watch Chris Rock describe a beaten up McCain »
King began the interview by asking Rock about Thursday's economic bailout talks when Obama and McCain went to the White House for discussions with the nation's top leaders.
KING: Obama and McCain at opposite ends of the table. What do you make of it?
ROCK: What do I make of it? If this was a boxing match, McCain would be holding.
KING: Holding on?
ROCK: Yes. It's like he got hit really hard in the stomach like, 'OK. I can't let him go. He's going to knock me out.' So that's what appears to be going on right now. Just a hold.
KING: Has the financial crisis affected you?
ROCK: Larry, I drove a cab over here tonight. When it's over, I'm going to try to pick up some more fares. I'm losing everything, Larry.
KING: Really downtrodden?
ROCK: Yes, it's real bad.
KING: Have HBO paid you already?
ROCK: They have paid me, but the money is worthless now. Haven't you heard? Your money's worth nothing.
KING: You must be ... proud that at this stage in our history a black man is running for president on a major ticket.
ROCK: Um, you know what? I'm proud Barack Obama's running for president. You know? If it was Flavor Flav, would I be proud? No. I don't support Barack Obama because he's black.
KING: I said just as a proud feeling. That's normal.
ROCK: There's a proud feeling because of the character of the man. You know, I was -- I supported John Kerry and, you know -- and what's my man? Al Gore.
KING: Al Gore.
ROCK: But this guy seems to be a little bit more. He seems to have watched other peoples' mistakes and, you know, seems to have a little bit more going on.
KING: From a comedic stand point, who is funnier, McCain or Obama? Seriously. Is Obama not -- it's hard to be funny about Obama?
ROCK: No, no. It's weird. People ask me that all the time. ... McCain jokes are just easy jokes, like I don't want a president with a bucket list. That's like a McCain joke. Those jokes are easy. It's like you basically, you know, you know, take the dust off your Reagan jokes and tell them again. You know?
But Obama, oh, this is a whole new set of jokes. I got to find a whole new move to the basket here. So I kind of hope he wins.
KING: Didn't you introduce Obama at a rally?
ROCK: I introduced Obama at the Apollo Theater not too long ago. I think Obama would be great. I mean, just look the big thing right now is the economy. And people are going broke. And here: The choice isn't Republican or Democrat. The choice is you got a guy that's worth $150 million with 12 houses against a guy who's worth a million dollars with one house.
KING: Well --
ROCK: The guy with one house really cares about losing a house, because he is homeless. The other guy can lose five houses and still got a bunch of houses. Does this make any sense? Am I the only one that sees this?
KING: It's unique way of ...
ROCK: I'm just saying, John McCain could lose half his houses.
KING: You got a point.
ROCK: And sleep well.
KING: You and Bill Clinton were on Letterman on Tuesday. You had some problems with the tone of his endorsement of Barack Obama. ... Do you think Bill is hesitant about Barack Obama?
ROCK: You know what? You know, he did a great speech in Denver. And Hillary's been on the campaign trail. Just at that moment, if you watched what happened on David Letterman, it appeared he was holding back. And when you tell a joke and everybody laughs, it is not because they disagree with what you're saying. So --
KING: They get it?
ROCK: Yes, they get it. The whole audience was in on it. But, you know, hey, the guy's in a weird position there. His wife ran for the thing and she didn't win.
KING: The next night, on "The Daily Show," Jon Stewart asked Clinton about the Letterman appearance and Clinton suggested that Obama supporters who questioned commitment are missing the point.
ROCK: It was great. It was great. And you're right, [Obama] does need to get some of the votes that went to Hillary and all that. I don't understand any Democrat that voted for Hillary that doesn't support Obama. Because their views are pretty similar. You know what I mean? ...
I understand people supporting Mr. McCain. But a Democrat that's going to just be mad is -- there's something kind of really messed up about that.
KING: Have you always done political humor?
ROCK: You know --
KING: When you started, did you do politics?
ROCK: I'm interested in the world. Jon Stewart does political humor. Bill Maher does political humor. I talk about stuff the way guys would talk about it at the barber shop. I don't belong on any panel on this show. You know what I mean? I don't deserve to be near Roland Martin and Anderson Cooper and all these guys. I try to talk about politics in a way a guy that works at UPS would understand.
KING: You did a lot of Brooklyn stuff.
ROCK: I do all sorts of stuff, Larry. All sorts of stuff. You know, I hope Obama wins just because, you know, the country needs it. The country needs a change. We kind of seen what this whole McCain thing is. And I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.
KING: I never thought of it that way.
ROCK: It is that simple
Comedian Chris Rock told Larry King he's proud of Barack Obama's character.
Rock, an avid supporter of Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama, spoke with CNN's Larry King on Thursday. He said Obama is more grounded with your average American -- not somebody like McCain with "12 houses."
"The other guy [McCain] can lose five houses," Rock said.
"I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house." Watch Chris Rock describe a beaten up McCain »
King began the interview by asking Rock about Thursday's economic bailout talks when Obama and McCain went to the White House for discussions with the nation's top leaders.
KING: Obama and McCain at opposite ends of the table. What do you make of it?
ROCK: What do I make of it? If this was a boxing match, McCain would be holding.
KING: Holding on?
ROCK: Yes. It's like he got hit really hard in the stomach like, 'OK. I can't let him go. He's going to knock me out.' So that's what appears to be going on right now. Just a hold.
KING: Has the financial crisis affected you?
ROCK: Larry, I drove a cab over here tonight. When it's over, I'm going to try to pick up some more fares. I'm losing everything, Larry.
KING: Really downtrodden?
ROCK: Yes, it's real bad.
KING: Have HBO paid you already?
ROCK: They have paid me, but the money is worthless now. Haven't you heard? Your money's worth nothing.
KING: You must be ... proud that at this stage in our history a black man is running for president on a major ticket.
ROCK: Um, you know what? I'm proud Barack Obama's running for president. You know? If it was Flavor Flav, would I be proud? No. I don't support Barack Obama because he's black.
KING: I said just as a proud feeling. That's normal.
ROCK: There's a proud feeling because of the character of the man. You know, I was -- I supported John Kerry and, you know -- and what's my man? Al Gore.
KING: Al Gore.
ROCK: But this guy seems to be a little bit more. He seems to have watched other peoples' mistakes and, you know, seems to have a little bit more going on.
KING: From a comedic stand point, who is funnier, McCain or Obama? Seriously. Is Obama not -- it's hard to be funny about Obama?
ROCK: No, no. It's weird. People ask me that all the time. ... McCain jokes are just easy jokes, like I don't want a president with a bucket list. That's like a McCain joke. Those jokes are easy. It's like you basically, you know, you know, take the dust off your Reagan jokes and tell them again. You know?
But Obama, oh, this is a whole new set of jokes. I got to find a whole new move to the basket here. So I kind of hope he wins.
KING: Didn't you introduce Obama at a rally?
ROCK: I introduced Obama at the Apollo Theater not too long ago. I think Obama would be great. I mean, just look the big thing right now is the economy. And people are going broke. And here: The choice isn't Republican or Democrat. The choice is you got a guy that's worth $150 million with 12 houses against a guy who's worth a million dollars with one house.
KING: Well --
ROCK: The guy with one house really cares about losing a house, because he is homeless. The other guy can lose five houses and still got a bunch of houses. Does this make any sense? Am I the only one that sees this?
KING: It's unique way of ...
ROCK: I'm just saying, John McCain could lose half his houses.
KING: You got a point.
ROCK: And sleep well.
KING: You and Bill Clinton were on Letterman on Tuesday. You had some problems with the tone of his endorsement of Barack Obama. ... Do you think Bill is hesitant about Barack Obama?
ROCK: You know what? You know, he did a great speech in Denver. And Hillary's been on the campaign trail. Just at that moment, if you watched what happened on David Letterman, it appeared he was holding back. And when you tell a joke and everybody laughs, it is not because they disagree with what you're saying. So --
KING: They get it?
ROCK: Yes, they get it. The whole audience was in on it. But, you know, hey, the guy's in a weird position there. His wife ran for the thing and she didn't win.
KING: The next night, on "The Daily Show," Jon Stewart asked Clinton about the Letterman appearance and Clinton suggested that Obama supporters who questioned commitment are missing the point.
ROCK: It was great. It was great. And you're right, [Obama] does need to get some of the votes that went to Hillary and all that. I don't understand any Democrat that voted for Hillary that doesn't support Obama. Because their views are pretty similar. You know what I mean? ...
I understand people supporting Mr. McCain. But a Democrat that's going to just be mad is -- there's something kind of really messed up about that.
KING: Have you always done political humor?
ROCK: You know --
KING: When you started, did you do politics?
ROCK: I'm interested in the world. Jon Stewart does political humor. Bill Maher does political humor. I talk about stuff the way guys would talk about it at the barber shop. I don't belong on any panel on this show. You know what I mean? I don't deserve to be near Roland Martin and Anderson Cooper and all these guys. I try to talk about politics in a way a guy that works at UPS would understand.
KING: You did a lot of Brooklyn stuff.
ROCK: I do all sorts of stuff, Larry. All sorts of stuff. You know, I hope Obama wins just because, you know, the country needs it. The country needs a change. We kind of seen what this whole McCain thing is. And I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.
KING: I never thought of it that way.
ROCK: It is that simple
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Beautiful veins and bloodshot eyes...
I am beyond exhausted, physically, mentally and just plain in my heart. I just really need a day to be away from absolutely everything and grieve for how I feel right now.
I don't like when I have to feel like a bitch, but I also don't like when I am disrespected. I don't like negative reinforcement without any positive reinforcement, and I especially don't like when my friends, who are doing a favor, are disrespected.
I am in no way okay with that.
I never got to take that nap I wanted to take today, and that was just way too sad.
Here's a video blog for today, don't mind the terrifying makeup. It's what's left after 3 hours of Magenta.
I want to feel good enough and pretty all of the times, not just some of them.
Karma cap for a better tomorrow.
I don't like when I have to feel like a bitch, but I also don't like when I am disrespected. I don't like negative reinforcement without any positive reinforcement, and I especially don't like when my friends, who are doing a favor, are disrespected.
I am in no way okay with that.
I never got to take that nap I wanted to take today, and that was just way too sad.
Here's a video blog for today, don't mind the terrifying makeup. It's what's left after 3 hours of Magenta.
I want to feel good enough and pretty all of the times, not just some of them.
Karma cap for a better tomorrow.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Well secluded, I see all....
There's a little sneak peak of what you get to see if you come to see the show. :)
It's definitely coming along. It's just gotten to the point, for me anyway, that I'm becoming my character and just having a total blast. What a great group of people, too. I honestly can't wait to get down to rehearsal every night. I really hope that it goes over well and that we raise some money!
I am going home after the class that I'm in right now and taking a huge nap. Well, I guess I'm gonna go visit Jamie and Harper first. Then it's time for a big fat nap until rehearsal. Screw vocal rest, I just need REST!
Monday, September 22, 2008
Don't dream it, be it!
Things have been a whirlwind of fun and craziness.
School is going well, but a little overwhelming on top of everything right. I have to say that I'm enjoying it so much more now that I have lots of friends and things to do there. Yay for Education and happy homecoming! I hope Kourtney wins!
A few things...
Last night we went to Pookie's party, which was a tremendous amount of fun. I just have to say that I love this boy with all of my heart, and even though I got a little tispy, I think this shows a pretty good example of our relationship. :)
Also, the show is going fantastically! I hope that everyone can make it out to see it. I bought the rest of my costume stuff tonight, so yeah. The cast is growing really close and the chemistry is getting better and better. I love it, and it would mean to the world to me if alot of people could come.
Today, I did tons of stuff - Courtney and I went grocery shopping, we went to Spirit Halloween, I got my costume stuff together, we watched the producers and ate Chicken and Rice with Davey boy, I went to rehearsal with Brad, we did cue to cue, then we stayed and helped to assemble and paint set stuff.
Now I am home, doing a few chores then getting some sleep before a long day tomorrow.
School is going well, but a little overwhelming on top of everything right. I have to say that I'm enjoying it so much more now that I have lots of friends and things to do there. Yay for Education and happy homecoming! I hope Kourtney wins!
A few things...
Last night we went to Pookie's party, which was a tremendous amount of fun. I just have to say that I love this boy with all of my heart, and even though I got a little tispy, I think this shows a pretty good example of our relationship. :)
Also, the show is going fantastically! I hope that everyone can make it out to see it. I bought the rest of my costume stuff tonight, so yeah. The cast is growing really close and the chemistry is getting better and better. I love it, and it would mean to the world to me if alot of people could come.
Today, I did tons of stuff - Courtney and I went grocery shopping, we went to Spirit Halloween, I got my costume stuff together, we watched the producers and ate Chicken and Rice with Davey boy, I went to rehearsal with Brad, we did cue to cue, then we stayed and helped to assemble and paint set stuff.
Now I am home, doing a few chores then getting some sleep before a long day tomorrow.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Believe me Adia, we are still innocent...
Today was an absolutely fantastic day. I got to see Harper and Jamie, I bought stuff for the Rocky Horror Show that made me feel cute, I had a cute dinner with cute people, and I laughed my ass off in Earth Science with Nina.
Next, Courtney and I had a wig party.
Then, as we were leaving to go see the Blue Barracudas, I realized something. I felt incredibly…..HAPPY. What a feeling.
For the first time, in so long…I FEEL HAPPY. It’s a great feeling. It was honestly just a great moment, and I know that there are so many reasons why, but I just thought it was worth writing down.
We went to see the ‘Cudas and they TORE IT UP! It was AWESOME! I can’t wait to go to more games.
After the game, we went to Bdubs and had a lot of laughs, and I just felt warm and loved.
I got home, and Em and I went to 711 to get some Ben and Jerry’s. We walked into the store and there was no one there, not even a cashier. So we walk over to the cooler, look, and it’s not there. We walk out of the store. As I’m opening the car door, this lady BUSTS out of the store, and looks at us and goes, “OK! WHAT DID YOU TAKE?!?!” We’re like uhhh…we didn’t take anything, and then a COP CAR pulls up. The police officer looks at us and asks us what we did. Emily already has her purse wide open on the car showing them that she didn’t take anything, and she’s like YOUR PURSE TOO, and I’m like yeah, I didn’t even BRING a purse. The cop must have asked her like 6 times if we minded him searching Em’s purse, and we’re like, uh NO, because we didn’t TAKE ANYTHING. He looks through, says okay and thank you, and the lady stormed back into the store, completely pissed off.
There was nothing to say besides the fact that this was just completely bizarre. So weird.
In short, it was a GREAT day. I’m going to keep feeling this way. It feels GREAT. <3
Next, Courtney and I had a wig party.
Then, as we were leaving to go see the Blue Barracudas, I realized something. I felt incredibly…..HAPPY. What a feeling.
For the first time, in so long…I FEEL HAPPY. It’s a great feeling. It was honestly just a great moment, and I know that there are so many reasons why, but I just thought it was worth writing down.
We went to see the ‘Cudas and they TORE IT UP! It was AWESOME! I can’t wait to go to more games.
After the game, we went to Bdubs and had a lot of laughs, and I just felt warm and loved.
I got home, and Em and I went to 711 to get some Ben and Jerry’s. We walked into the store and there was no one there, not even a cashier. So we walk over to the cooler, look, and it’s not there. We walk out of the store. As I’m opening the car door, this lady BUSTS out of the store, and looks at us and goes, “OK! WHAT DID YOU TAKE?!?!” We’re like uhhh…we didn’t take anything, and then a COP CAR pulls up. The police officer looks at us and asks us what we did. Emily already has her purse wide open on the car showing them that she didn’t take anything, and she’s like YOUR PURSE TOO, and I’m like yeah, I didn’t even BRING a purse. The cop must have asked her like 6 times if we minded him searching Em’s purse, and we’re like, uh NO, because we didn’t TAKE ANYTHING. He looks through, says okay and thank you, and the lady stormed back into the store, completely pissed off.
There was nothing to say besides the fact that this was just completely bizarre. So weird.
In short, it was a GREAT day. I’m going to keep feeling this way. It feels GREAT. <3
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Lets pray to god she's not the first woman president....
Love the Vlog Brothers!
This is a little propaganday, but I found it interesting. Check out the actual website and follow the links, they really are credible sources!
http://www.grizzlybay.org/SarahPalinInfoPage.htm
Top Facts Everyone Must Know About Sarah Palin
All facts below about Sarah Palin are backed up by links to credible news sources
1) She is opposed to abortion even in cases of rape and incest (even if victims are children)
2) She offered a bounty of $150 for each left front leg of freshly killed wolves
3) She is presently under investigation in Alaska for abuse of power
4) She strongly supports drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge
5) She promotes aerial hunting of wolves and bears even though Alaskans voted twice to ban the practice (VIDEO)
6) She used $400,000 of state money to fund a propaganda campaign in support of aerial hunting
7) She is a champion for big oil and her campaign slogan has become "Drill, baby, drill!"
8) She believes creationism should be taught in public schools
9) She believes man-made global warming is a farce
10) She is opposed to listing the polar bear as an endangered species because it might limit oil exploitation
11) While mayor of Wasilla she tried to fire the city librarian because the librarian refused to censor books
12) She supports the Alaskan Independence Party which seeks independence from the United States (VIDEO)
13) As mayor of Wasilla, she made rape victims pay for their own forensic evidence kits
14) She is opposed to listing the Cook Inlet beluga whale as an endangered species
15) She obtained her first passport just last year (2007)
This is a little propaganday, but I found it interesting. Check out the actual website and follow the links, they really are credible sources!
http://www.grizzlybay.org/SarahPalinInfoPage.htm
Top Facts Everyone Must Know About Sarah Palin
All facts below about Sarah Palin are backed up by links to credible news sources
1) She is opposed to abortion even in cases of rape and incest (even if victims are children)
2) She offered a bounty of $150 for each left front leg of freshly killed wolves
3) She is presently under investigation in Alaska for abuse of power
4) She strongly supports drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge
5) She promotes aerial hunting of wolves and bears even though Alaskans voted twice to ban the practice (VIDEO)
6) She used $400,000 of state money to fund a propaganda campaign in support of aerial hunting
7) She is a champion for big oil and her campaign slogan has become "Drill, baby, drill!"
8) She believes creationism should be taught in public schools
9) She believes man-made global warming is a farce
10) She is opposed to listing the polar bear as an endangered species because it might limit oil exploitation
11) While mayor of Wasilla she tried to fire the city librarian because the librarian refused to censor books
12) She supports the Alaskan Independence Party which seeks independence from the United States (VIDEO)
13) As mayor of Wasilla, she made rape victims pay for their own forensic evidence kits
14) She is opposed to listing the Cook Inlet beluga whale as an endangered species
15) She obtained her first passport just last year (2007)
It was, we that were the cliche'
I missed my journaling yesterday, so I’m probably gonna have a lot to say today.
MY CAMERA IS FINALLY FIXED! That makes me so happy, because it’s just been such a stupid situation. I’m really into taking pictures right now, as opposed to being in them, so hiding behind a camera is kind of a good excuse for me. I’m working on fixing that, but it’s gonna probably take awhile.
So today I had classes and they were all really great. I love this semester so much. I totally owned my Linguistics exam! On my way back from hanging out with Nina, I ran right into Meagan Dreher, and we had an incredible lunch at DC1. We honestly giggled every single second we were in the cafeteria. We might have been a little annoying, but it was so much fun.
What else. I’m really excited about the cudas starting. I’ll have to take a lot of pics of that!
I feel like I had a million and a half things that I wanted to write about but I can’t think of any of them right now…
The condo is great, and I’m lovin’ life on my own. (well, on my own plus cute Emily and cute Cammy)
I know I have more to say, but I just can’t think of it right now because I am mentally exhausted.
MY CAMERA IS FINALLY FIXED! That makes me so happy, because it’s just been such a stupid situation. I’m really into taking pictures right now, as opposed to being in them, so hiding behind a camera is kind of a good excuse for me. I’m working on fixing that, but it’s gonna probably take awhile.
So today I had classes and they were all really great. I love this semester so much. I totally owned my Linguistics exam! On my way back from hanging out with Nina, I ran right into Meagan Dreher, and we had an incredible lunch at DC1. We honestly giggled every single second we were in the cafeteria. We might have been a little annoying, but it was so much fun.
What else. I’m really excited about the cudas starting. I’ll have to take a lot of pics of that!
I feel like I had a million and a half things that I wanted to write about but I can’t think of any of them right now…
The condo is great, and I’m lovin’ life on my own. (well, on my own plus cute Emily and cute Cammy)
I know I have more to say, but I just can’t think of it right now because I am mentally exhausted.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Rose tint my world, keep me safe from my trouble and pain...
Today I went to Chris and Laura’s wedding shower. They are honestly one of the reasons I believe that love is attainable for everyone. They are just each other’s puzzle pieces, and I am so happy for them. I got to see their new house and it just made me super happy, so I wanted to write about that.
In other news, I am really excited about the Rocky Horror Show. I am so excited about how it’s pulling together, and I’m so ready to just run the hell out of this show and perform it for people who love it. It’s gonna be a blast. I am so happy about all of the great people I’ve met during this experience, and those I’ve become closer with. Yay for dancing with your friends in your underoos!
Also, It’s Pookie’s Birthday as of 12 minutes ago. I just got off the phone with him. I love that boy.
So today I realized a few things.
1) My anxiety has gotten so bad that I have to remove myself from situations before yelling or crying.
2) Taking myself out of said situations for awhile is a really good idea.
3) My family and I sometimes have a hard time understanding each other. Moving out was a really good idea because now , (I at least) will be able to really treasure the times that I have with them, and the frustration of being too many adults in too little of a space will hopefully be gone.
4) Courtney Davidson is an amazing friend and I am so blessed to have her in my life. And I quote…”What exactly induced the rage? Should I bring ice cream or a shot gun?” That is what being a best friend is all about when you are a girl. J
5) My mom makes me so happy. I know we fight once in awhile, but I really am my Momma’s girl.
6) I am finding great solace in the act of living. Just being. This is awesome, and I’m way too excited every chance I get to just clean, or watch tv, or sit. Living is just feeling amazing right now.
I’m really excited to go see the first real game for the Blue Barracudas this week. Should be a fun time for realios.
I unpacked my DVDs today, so that was good. I really need to finish putting my clothes away and get the rest of the stuff from my parent’s house. I also cleaned the kitchen, hallways, and my bathroom. Sundays are always a good day for cleaning and I really feel so fulfilled after I have a clean house. Wow, I’m lame.
It’s time for a shower or sleep. I haven’t quite decided yet.
Be well!
Saturday, September 13, 2008
I'm fine and dandy with the me inside...
Starting a new journal has been weighing heavy on my mind, and I honestly type faster than I write, so I think this will be fantastic. I'm going to keep most of it public, but I'm sure there will be personal bits and pieces that I don't feel like sharing with the world. I've decided to go blogger because honestly, I just type faster than I write, and I'm seriously always at my computer. I also thought it would be a great way for people like my mom, or whoever, (she's probably the only one) to see what I've been up to or whatever. And - you can post pictures or whatever you want on this site, so yeah. Woo blog.
So I guess the biggest thing I have to write about is that I am starting a new chapter of my life by moving out of my parents house. I have wonderful parents and a wonderful brother who I love very very much, but I have realized that I have become too comfortable. Therapy has taught me something about myself - I love being comfortable and I want to cling to "forever", but I'm actually only happy when I'm starting something new. I don't know if that's exactly the best way to put it. I only feel fulfilled when I'm still passionate about something or starting something new. So, I figured, the degree isn't gonna roll around for awhile, I'm going to be doing the same kind of job for awhile, why not take a big step and move out.
I am super blessed to share a condo with a lovely girl named Emily who I've known for probably 10ish years now. She is honestly one of the best people on this planet, and honestly she's one of the only people I could probably handle living with. She has a crazy but lovable cat named Cambria, and it is great.
I honestly think that moving out is going to do wonders for me. I won't lie, it hasn't been all that easy for me. It's very hard for me to let go of what is comfortable and familiar. I never even left my parent's house for a semester of college, so even though it's not far away, and I live with someone I already know very well - it's a big step for me. In therapy, and well, I guess now that I've lived out of my parent's house for a week, I've realized - contrary to popular belief - that I am one of the lonliest people that I know. Mind you, I have lots of great best friends, friends, brothers in my fraternity, etc. but I don't have alot of what I'm looking for. That's okay, but it's time to start aligning the stars correctly so that I can get where I need to be.
It's hard to take a step outside of your life and look at what's really been going on. Being out of my house has made me realize so much about my friendships, my relationship with my family, my relationship with myself...some ways good, some ways bad, but it's definitely a growing experience.
It's looking at the little things...like, oops I got in the shower without a towel...if I lived on my own, who would get me that towel? Coming home to an empty house is extremely weird for me. Are people my friends because they are there and so am I, or do they still want to be there if I have to call them first? Am I a tag along, or am I a gatherer? I've been majorly sick all week. No one is there to pamper me. But that's good. I need to be able to find comfort in myself in order to find comfort in others. No more reaching out and reaching out waiting for something to fall back. I need to reach out to myself first.
I'm adjusting. I'm happy with my choice, but not happy at every moment. I'm very sentimental, and sometimes saying goodbye to my mom on the phone is hard for me. Not seeing her every day is alot harder to me than I thought it would be. Not seeing Asia, or hearing Mickey whistling tugs at my heart strings a little. It's nice to call my mom and hear her voice, or to get an IM from Norman. It's also nice to know that I am being an adult, and that people want to come see my house and such. I don't know. This is huge for me! It's important for me to do this. I'm definitely not unhappy. I'm very happy with this choice. I'm just not going to pretend that I don't have my moments where I kind of think, well if I hadn't moved out I'd be doing this at this moment. But, I think I'd have many more of those moments if I hadn't actually moved out. I'd definitely regret it, and I am just putting as much into this commitment to myself as I can.
One of my biggest concerns, and I know this would sound super silly to most people, is that my Grandma, who was pretty much my world growing up, wouldn't follow me to the condo. I constantly have talks with her at night, and I could just feel her in my room. The same room we shared so many times and had so many laughs in - I just hope she knows where to find me. I'm sure she does, but you know...yeah. I'm a little silly, but it's important to me.
I hate to keep saying I'm happy but I'm not. The truth is: I wasn't happy to begin with, so there's no way that this could bring instant happiness. I think when you move out so many people expect you to crash financially or emotionally or in whatever way; I don't think that will be me. I'm not gonna crash, but it's not like an instant fix either - it's just a great big step (more like a jump or a leap, even) in the right direction.
So there's that post. It's like an intro to the journal that I'm about to keep. It's closing a chapter in my life, and opening a new one.
Here goes nothin'.
So I guess the biggest thing I have to write about is that I am starting a new chapter of my life by moving out of my parents house. I have wonderful parents and a wonderful brother who I love very very much, but I have realized that I have become too comfortable. Therapy has taught me something about myself - I love being comfortable and I want to cling to "forever", but I'm actually only happy when I'm starting something new. I don't know if that's exactly the best way to put it. I only feel fulfilled when I'm still passionate about something or starting something new. So, I figured, the degree isn't gonna roll around for awhile, I'm going to be doing the same kind of job for awhile, why not take a big step and move out.
I am super blessed to share a condo with a lovely girl named Emily who I've known for probably 10ish years now. She is honestly one of the best people on this planet, and honestly she's one of the only people I could probably handle living with. She has a crazy but lovable cat named Cambria, and it is great.
I honestly think that moving out is going to do wonders for me. I won't lie, it hasn't been all that easy for me. It's very hard for me to let go of what is comfortable and familiar. I never even left my parent's house for a semester of college, so even though it's not far away, and I live with someone I already know very well - it's a big step for me. In therapy, and well, I guess now that I've lived out of my parent's house for a week, I've realized - contrary to popular belief - that I am one of the lonliest people that I know. Mind you, I have lots of great best friends, friends, brothers in my fraternity, etc. but I don't have alot of what I'm looking for. That's okay, but it's time to start aligning the stars correctly so that I can get where I need to be.
It's hard to take a step outside of your life and look at what's really been going on. Being out of my house has made me realize so much about my friendships, my relationship with my family, my relationship with myself...some ways good, some ways bad, but it's definitely a growing experience.
It's looking at the little things...like, oops I got in the shower without a towel...if I lived on my own, who would get me that towel? Coming home to an empty house is extremely weird for me. Are people my friends because they are there and so am I, or do they still want to be there if I have to call them first? Am I a tag along, or am I a gatherer? I've been majorly sick all week. No one is there to pamper me. But that's good. I need to be able to find comfort in myself in order to find comfort in others. No more reaching out and reaching out waiting for something to fall back. I need to reach out to myself first.
I'm adjusting. I'm happy with my choice, but not happy at every moment. I'm very sentimental, and sometimes saying goodbye to my mom on the phone is hard for me. Not seeing her every day is alot harder to me than I thought it would be. Not seeing Asia, or hearing Mickey whistling tugs at my heart strings a little. It's nice to call my mom and hear her voice, or to get an IM from Norman. It's also nice to know that I am being an adult, and that people want to come see my house and such. I don't know. This is huge for me! It's important for me to do this. I'm definitely not unhappy. I'm very happy with this choice. I'm just not going to pretend that I don't have my moments where I kind of think, well if I hadn't moved out I'd be doing this at this moment. But, I think I'd have many more of those moments if I hadn't actually moved out. I'd definitely regret it, and I am just putting as much into this commitment to myself as I can.
One of my biggest concerns, and I know this would sound super silly to most people, is that my Grandma, who was pretty much my world growing up, wouldn't follow me to the condo. I constantly have talks with her at night, and I could just feel her in my room. The same room we shared so many times and had so many laughs in - I just hope she knows where to find me. I'm sure she does, but you know...yeah. I'm a little silly, but it's important to me.
I hate to keep saying I'm happy but I'm not. The truth is: I wasn't happy to begin with, so there's no way that this could bring instant happiness. I think when you move out so many people expect you to crash financially or emotionally or in whatever way; I don't think that will be me. I'm not gonna crash, but it's not like an instant fix either - it's just a great big step (more like a jump or a leap, even) in the right direction.
So there's that post. It's like an intro to the journal that I'm about to keep. It's closing a chapter in my life, and opening a new one.
Here goes nothin'.
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